The Books That Changed My Life
From leadership to mindset: 46 shelf‑worthy reads that shape how I think, lead, and grow.
"A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. The man who never reads lives only one."
— George R.R. Martin
I love physical books. There’s something special about holding them, turning pages, and scribbling notes in the margins. I read digitally too. It’s convenient, fast, and practical. But when a book truly resonates, I buy a physical copy. If it earns a spot on my shelf, it means I want it close.
This list doesn’t include every book I’ve read. Just the ones that changed how I think, lead, and live. My bookshelf1 isn’t decoration. It’s filled with mentors, coaches, and trusted companions on my journey as a leader and lifelong learner.
Below, you’ll find my favourites organized by category, each with summaries and personal highlights.
These books are my best of the best.
1. Leadership & Management
The following are books that guide readers through various leadership roles, from engineering management to executive leadership, and general organizational change.
1.1 Engineering Management
Help you transition from engineer to manager (team leader, engineering manager, etc.), with insights on leadership, team dynamics, and mentorship.
The Manager’s Path – Camille Fournier
A Guide for Tech Leaders Navigating Growth and Change
A roadmap for transitioning from individual contributor to technical leadership, with insights into mentorship, feedback, and team dynamics.
Become an Effective Software Engineering Manager – James Stanier
Practical advice for new engineering managers, covering communication, team development, and the shift from coding to leadership.High Output Management – Andrew S. Grove
A classic management guide from Intel’s former CEO, emphasizing output-oriented management and effective team leadership.An Elegant Puzzle – Will Larson
Systems of Engineering Management
Tackles complex engineering management challenges through systems thinking, addressing team structure, scaling, and organizational design.Engineering Management for the Rest of Us – Sarah Drasner
Offers empathetic, approachable leadership strategies focusing on communication and building inclusive, high-performing teams.
1.2 Technical Executive Leadership
Cover strategic thinking for tech leaders (managers, directors, VPs and CTOs)—scaling teams, setting vision, and aligning tech with business goals.
Team Topologies – Matthew Skelton & Manuel Pais
Organizing Business and Technology Teams for Fast Flow
Explores optimal team structures and interactions to enhance software delivery and organizational effectiveness.The Engineering Executive’s Primer – Will Larson
Impactful Technical Leadership
Guidance for engineering executives on scaling teams, setting strategic vision, and driving impactful organizational change.The CTO ToolBox – Sergio Gago Huerta
The definitive list of tools and resources for Technology Leaders
A practical collection of tools and frameworks for CTOs, covering strategic alignment, team building, and tech-business integration.
1.3 General Leadership & Organizational Change
Cover leadership principles for any domain—focused on collaboration, empowerment, and execution.
Turn the Ship Around! – L. David Marquet
A True Story of Turning Followers into Leaders
A former submarine captain’s story of empowering his crew with a leader-leader model, transforming organizational performance.Leading Teams – Mandy Flint & Elisabet Vinberg Hearn
10 Challenges, 10 Solutions
Practical approaches to resolving team challenges through trust, collaboration, and shared purpose.The Art of Action – Stephen Bungay
How Leaders Close the Gaps between Plans, Actions and Results
Combines military strategy with business insights to improve alignment, execution, and decision-making.
2. Technical Mastery & Engineering Craft
The books of this section are dedicated to enhancing technical skills, covering advanced engineering roles, software design, architecture, and craftsmanship.
2.1 Staff & Principal Engineering
Help senior engineers grow their influence, lead without authority, and make strategic technical impact.
The Staff Engineer’s Path – Tanya Reilly
A Guide for Individual Contributors Navigating Growth and Change
Guides senior engineers on navigating influence without authority, project execution, and mentoring across teams.Staff Engineer – Will Larson
Leadership Beyond the Management Track
Defines the staff engineer role, focusing on leadership, architecture, and strategic technical impact beyond management.
2.2 Software Design & Architecture
Focus on building scalable, maintainable systems with strong design principles and architecture.
Designing Data-Intensive Applications – Martin Kleppmann
A comprehensive guide to building scalable and maintainable data systems, with a focus on storage, processing, and integration.System Design Interview – Alex Xu & Sahn Lam
An Insider’s Guide: Volume 2
Frameworks and real-world examples for tackling advanced system design problems effectively.Understanding Distributed Systems – Roberto Vitillo
What every developer should know about large distributed applications
Practical insights on building scalable, reliable distributed systems with a focus on fault tolerance and real-world applications.A Philosophy of Software Design – John Ousterhout
Discusses how to manage complexity and improve maintainability through thoughtful design principles.Practical Object-Oriented Design in Ruby – Sandi Metz
Teaches clean, maintainable OOP design using Ruby, with real-world examples and principles.
2.3 Software Craftsmanship & Engineering
Cover the path to engineering excellence—best practices, learning, and writing quality code.
The Pragmatic Programmer – Andrew Hunt & David Thomas
From Journeyman to Master
Offers timeless programming wisdom and practical tips to become a more adaptable and effective software developer.The Software Engineer’s Guidebook – Gergely Orosz
Navigating senior, tech lead, and staff engineer positions at tech companies and startups
A roadmap from junior to senior engineer, offering guidance on technical excellence and career growth.Modern Software Engineering – David Farley
Doing What Works to Build Better Software Faster
Advocates for continuous delivery, feedback loops, and disciplined engineering practices to improve software delivery.Elixir in Action – Saša Jurić
Introduces Elixir and functional programming for building concurrent, resilient applications.
3. Product, Business & Strategy
This section covers the intersection of product development, business strategy, and startup methodologies, providing frameworks for building successful products and organizations.
3.1 Product Discovery & Management
Focus on understanding customers, continuous discovery, and strong product management.
Inspired – Marty Cagan
How to Create Tech Products Customers Love
Reveals how top tech companies create products that customers love, emphasizing strong product management and discovery.Continuous Discovery Habits – Teresa Torres
Discover Products that Create Customer Value and Business Value
Provides a framework for ongoing customer discovery to inform effective, evidence-based product decisions.
3.2 Business & Startup Strategy
Cover strategy, startup methods, and how to scale a business effectively.
Good Strategy Bad Strategy – Richard Rumelt
The Difference and Why It Matters
Distinguishes good strategies from bad ones and presents tools to craft focused, actionable plans.The Goal – Eliyahu M. Goldratt
A Process of Ongoing Improvement
A business novel introducing the Theory of Constraints through a story-driven approach to continuous improvement.The Lean Startup – Eric Ries
A foundational book on building startups efficiently through iterative development and validated learning.Predictable Revenue – Aaron Ross & Marylou Tyler
Turn Your Business Into a Sales Machine with the $100 Million Best Practices of Salesforce.com
A playbook for scaling B2B sales through repeatable outbound systems.The Hard Thing About Hard Things – Ben Horowitz
Building a Business When There Are No Easy Answers
Brutally honest lessons from a CEO’s journey through building and surviving tough startup situations.
3.3 Culture, Collaboration & Ways of Working
Focus on the people side of tech—team dynamics, remote work, and workplace culture.
Peopleware – Tom DeMarco & Timothy Lister
Productive Projects and Teams
A classic exploring how team environment and human factors drive software success more than tools or processes.Rework – Jason Fried & David Heinemeier Hansson
A bold rethinking of traditional business wisdom, focused on simplicity and impact over process.Remote – Jason Fried & David Heinemeier Hansson
Office Not Required
A practical guide to managing distributed teams and thriving in a remote-first world.The Geek Way – Andrew McAfee
The Radical Mindset that Drives Extraordinary Results
Explores how “geek” values like transparency, experimentation, and speed can revolutionize organizational culture.The DevOps Handbook – Gene Kim, Jez Humble, Patrick Debois, and John Willis
How to Create World-Class Agility, Reliability, and Security in Technology Organizations
Comprehensive guide on how to build high-performing technology organizations by combining DevOps, lean principles, and continuous delivery.
4. Mindset & Personal Growth
4.1 Habits, Focus & Deep Work
Build better habits, focus deeply, and sustain long-term productivity.
Atomic Habits – James Clear
An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones
Breakthrough framework for building good habits and eliminating bad ones using behavioral psychology.Deep Work – Cal Newport
Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World
Advocates for deep focus and provides tactics to minimize distractions in knowledge work.
4.2 Communication, Negotiation & Influence
Sharpen your communication—be clear, assertive, persuasive, and confident in every conversation.
On Writing Well – William Zinsser
The Classic Guide to Writing Nonfiction
A gold standard for clear, graceful nonfiction writing.Never Split the Difference – Chris Voss
Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It
Negotiation tactics from an FBI hostage negotiator that are surprisingly useful in everyday business and life.How to Win Friends & Influence People – Dale Carnegie
Timeless, practical advice on how to connect with others, build trust, and influence outcomes.When I Say No, I Feel Guilty – Manuel J. Smith
How to Cope - Using the Skills of Systematic Assertive Therapy
A powerful introduction to assertiveness training using systematic behavioral techniques.
4.3 Mental Toughness & Discipline
Push past limits, develop grit, and strengthen your mindset through challenge and discomfort.
Can’t Hurt Me – David Goggins
Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds
A story of how extreme discipline and grit helped Goggins overcome trauma and achieve the impossible.Never Finished – David Goggins
The follow-up to Can’t Hurt Me, doubling down on relentless self-improvement.
4.4 Stoicism, Antifragility & Self-Mastery
Cultivate resilience, clarity, and control—learn to thrive under pressure and lead yourself first.
The Daily Stoic – Ryan Holiday & Stephen Hanselman
366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living
Daily meditations from Stoic philosophers to help navigate modern life with clarity and resilience.Invicto – Marcos Vázquez
Logra más, sufre menos
A Spanish-language book on discipline, Stoicism, and living a purpose-driven life.
Antifragile – Nassim Nicholas Taleb
Things That Gain from Disorder
Explores how certain systems actually benefit from chaos, volatility, and disorder.Thinking, Fast and Slow – Daniel Kahneman
Nobel-winning insights into how we think, decide, and often fail without realizing it.
My Top 10 Personal Favourites
I’ve read dozens of books on leadership, engineering, strategy, and personal growth—but these are the ones that stuck. I return to them often. Some brought clarity when I needed it; others pushed me to lead better, think deeper, or grow stronger. They live on my shelf because they changed something in me.
These are my all-time favourites, in no particular order. Each one includes a brilliant quote from the book, a brief note on why it matters to me, and a link where I’ve mentioned it (or a related post on a similar topic). They’re not just great reads—they’ve stuck with me and earned their place.
1. The Manager’s Path
I picked up this book early on my management journey. It didn’t have all the answers, but it gave me a fresh perspective on leadership—one that focused on growing with my team, not above them.
“Regular 1-1s are like oil changes; if you skip them, plan to get stranded on the side of the highway at the worst possible time. Marc Hedlund.”
2. High Output Management
This book changed how I think about my job as a manager. Grove turns management into a process—clear, structured, and measurable. It helped me become more intentional about how I lead and scale teams.
“The output of a manager is the output of the organizational units under his or her supervision or influence.”
3. Team Topologies
It gave me the language to talk about team structure, flow, and ownership—things we often feel but struggle to explain. Every engineering leader should read this.
“When cognitive load isn’t considered, teams are spread thin trying to cover an excessive amount of responsibilities and domains.”
4. Turn the Ship Around!
This book reshaped how I think about authority. Marquet shows that true leadership is about giving control, not taking it. It made me a more empowering, trust-first leader.
“Leadership is communicating to people their worth and potential so clearly that they are inspired to see it in themselves.”
5. The Staff Engineer’s Path
I wish this existed earlier in my career. It captures the messy, unspoken side of being a senior IC—the politics, the influence, the impact beyond code. It’s practical and refreshingly honest.
“You should put points into what you want to be good at so you can build up those skills.”
6. Designing Data-Intensive Applications
I don’t just reference this book—I study it. It’s helped me make smarter architectural decisions and understand trade-offs at scale. Every time I open it, I learn something new.
“Building for scale that you don’t need is a waste of effort and may lock you into an inflexible design.”
7. The Pragmatic Programmer
This is the book that made me fall in love with the craft of software engineering. It’s full of timeless wisdom—simple, sharp, and always relevant.
“You can’t write perfect software. Did that hurt? It shouldn’t. Accept it as an axiom of life.”
8. Atomic Habits
This book helped me actually change. It’s not about motivation—it’s about designing systems that make success inevitable. Small steps, done right, can be transformational.
“All big things come from small beginnings. The seed of every habit is a single, tiny decision.”
9 .Never Split the Difference
This book changed how I approach conversations—at work, in life, everywhere. It taught me the importance of listening well and asking the right questions.
“He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of negotiation.”
10. Can’t Hurt Me
It’s raw and intense—and exactly what I needed during tough moments. Goggins taught me that limits are mostly in our minds, and discipline is freedom.
“You are in danger of living a life so comfortable and soft, that you will die without ever realizing your true potential.”
Final Thoughts
Every book on this list has shaped me in some meaningful way. Whether by shifting my perspective, advancing my career, or simply helping me see life more clearly.
But the real power of reading isn’t just in discovering new ideas. It’s in taking action and letting those ideas change you.
These are my favourites. What about yours? I’d love to hear which books have made a difference in your life.
Happy reading,
Rafa
Thanks for reading The Engineering Leader. 🙏
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If you’re curious about the objects on top of my bookshelf (from left to right):
A vintage-style vinyl record player – A thoughtful farewell gift from my peers when I left Funding Circle UK. Still brings back great memories.
A red Daruma doll – A traditional Japanese symbol of perseverance and good luck. A meaningful gift from my wife.
A retro-style radio with silver knobs – Might come in handy during Spain’s occasional blackouts. Yes, they happen.
A reed diffuser with wooden sticks – Bamboo-scented and surprisingly effective. The room smells amazing.
Just a corner of our printer – My daughters love printing coloring pages to paint. Ink runs out fast in this house.
Excellent list. I managed to read many of them and I can confirm the list is a masterpiece! thanks for sharing.
Excellent list, and a great resource. Thankfully I’ve read most of them :)